Tuesday, 29 September 2009

Does My Butt Look Big In This RV?

In July 2007 a study was written up in the New England Journal of Medicine using data from the Framingham Heart Study that one of the most prevalent reasons people are obese is not due to lack of physical activity, nor genetics. nor education.

It’s all about your peer group. (* Nickolas Christakis and James Fowler)

If your girlfriends are packing on an extra 40 pounds – chances are you are in the dressing room next to them at the Pretty and Plump looking at size 24’s.

However, if your best buddies are chowing down on carrot sticks – chances are you are sharing the bag with them while you take your daily walk.

So what do I see as I look around at my fellow RV’ers in the Walmart parking lot last night in Rapid City? Or the KOA here in Interior, South Dakota (population 76)?

This past week three separate friends emailed the latest photos montage making the rounds called “The People of Walmart” Are these are My People? My peer group?

While the cross dresser in his 4 inch high yellow go-go boots looked quite thin, and the guy in cowboy boots and pink velour work out pants was doing pretty good, the women were a mess. Rolls. I am talking rolls on top of rolls. I am talking stretched out stretch pants.

If I am to believe this study, expandable waistline polyester slacks are in my future.

But I know these folks we are randomly parked next to for the night are not my peer group but just in case I am taking control!

No fun size bags of Reece’s Peanut Butter Cups for the RV. Bunny Luv Carrots and water rule!

Roll over. Roll on.

Wednesday, 23 September 2009

A Typical Day

A Typical RV Day: Yellowstone National Park

Monday – or is it Tuesday?

7:30 ish Wake up in Yellowstone National Park - Fishing Bridge Area RV park.

8 – 8:30 Breakfast in the RV. Cereal, corn muffins, coffee and juice

9:00 ish RV Elementary

School begins with Ms. Penelope Snodgrass sitting in for Mr. Higgenbottom who is busy digging through the basement compartment of the RV looking for warm clothes because it is cold here in Yellowstone. Mr. Higgenbottom also needs to attend to the backed up sewer issue, figure out why we are going through so much propane, and duct tape the roof after an unfortunate incident with a low hanging tree.

School starts with our usual quote of the day, which elder student hates and thinks is pointless and younger student hates because he has to write it down in his daily journal.

Today’s quote was from George Mathew Allen and reads: "People who live with many interests live not only longest but happiest."

Conversation ensued to discuss interests of said students which included the usual suspects of computer games, Lego, robotics, music, reading and world domination. Discussed why it is important to be well rounded with lots of interests.

We then went through the Junior Ranger packets to see what was required and make sure we took the necessary hikes, explored the habitats of moose, and understood the importance of geothermal hot springs. We have two days to fulfill the requirements, pass the quiz, take the oath, and get the patch!

Note: All US National Parks have the Junior Ranger program. It consists of an age appropriate packet or newspaper that the kids need to fill in, attend ranger talks, do some drawings and reflections. Each park has a unique patch that says Junior Ranger on it that the kids collect and sew on to their hoodies. Adults can do them to. Yes, I am after my Yellowstone Junior Ranger Patch as well!

10:30 Departure with Mr. Higgenbottom on bicycles to the Mud Volcano to make the 11 AM Ranger Talk

10:45 Find our Mud Volcano site is 7 miles away. Bike back to RV, unplug electric and water, bring in the slide in, lock bikes and head out like proverbial Bats out of Hell to make 11 am ranger talk.

11:02 Arrive at Mud Volcano

11 – 1:30 Ranger Talk and ramble through incredible geothermal mud pots, mud springs, Dragon’s Mouth churning pool of stinky sulfer water. Also touch on wildlife and indigenous tribes from area.

1:40 Drive back the 7 miles to Fishing Bridge Visitors Center.

2 – 2:45 Make lunch in RV and have picnic at visitor’s center overlooking Lake Yellowstone. Lunch: quesadillas, grapes, yoghurt.

3 – 4:30 Simon and Ms. Snodgrass continue school at Visitor Center - Music and Art.

Listen to headphones in Visitor Center of violin concerto written for Yellowstone and tell stories and draw pictures that were inspired by music.

Look at diorama of grizzly bears and draw their picture.

Read children’s book about the origin of the real Smokey the Bear.

Sit by lake are play the recorder. Or at least try.


3 – 4:30 Josh and Mr. Higgenbottom take the RV to continue school at Merry’s Bay, about 5 miles down the road where the blackberry can pick up a phone tower signal and then convert it to the internet on the computer so Josh can do some of his on line home schooling.

4:30 – 6:30 Fill up propane, do laundry.

6:30 – 7 Make dinner, boys ride bikes, play in woods, play with balls, read books, complain about how they don’t like living in an RV.

7 – 8:30 Wash dishes, shower.

8:30 – 9:30 Watch The Walton’s on TV in RV.

10 PM Good night John Boy

This is So Not a Vacation

Can we be clear here. This thing we are doing – living in an RV for a year - is no vacation. We are not waking up each morning wondering if we should go swimming or play croquet.

We do not send our laundry out.

We are not drinking gin and tonics watching the sunset over the rockies. But we could. And on second thought - we should!

This is a lot tougher than I ever imagined. Not that it is all bad mind you, but we are running a household and being school teachers, companions and parents in a tiny space. Of course to quote Simon, "We have a little house, but the whole world is our garden."

All the stuff we dealt with in terms of parenting and chores are still with us. Parenthood: you can run but you can’t hide.

This morning’s conversation was about allowances. We had previously decided that allowances were suspended during the RV trip but there has been a mutiny among the troops. The proposal on the table, as presented by Counselor/CFO Josh, would be for Josh to get $4 a week and Simon $3. That is one dollar a day less from the family budget of $110/day.

I thought that sounded a bit high. What do they need to spend all that money on each week? I thought after getting rid of bags and bags of useless plastic objects when we moved had made an impact. The boys said they needed that money in order to save up for Christmas gifts for us. Here is the dilemma: Do we give our kids money so they can save it to give back to us in the form of Christmas gifts?

We decided that Josh would get $2 a week and Simon $1.50 cash, and that we would keep the remaining $2 and $1.50 would go into a Christmas savings account that they would get in a lump sum the first week of December. The money could be used to buy each other gifts.

But they can make gifts for Evan and me, family and friends and Mom and Dad would pay for the supplies. We will each come up with proposals on what we can make and when we are in Hood River in a proper house for a few weeks over Thanksgiving we will make the gifts. Let’s see how it works.

Right now we are in Yellowstone National Park camping in Fishing Bridge. We drove up here from the Grand Tetons National Park where they have a great Urgent Care. Simon has strep throat so we now have a 10 day supply of Amoxicillian in the fridge.

Real life skills we have taught the kids in the last month:

How laundromats work.
How to budget.
How to make Ramen noodles into a meal with added vegetables and chicken.
How to dry dishes.
How to use a bike lock.
How to tie shoes.
How speedometers and odometers work.
The difference between gas and propane.

And most importantly, how to take a shower with very little water.

Here is the Shower Ritual:

1. Remove bag of dirty laundry that is stored in shower stall. Put on bed.

2. Remove laundry basket full of cleaning supplies, bags of potatoes, onions and apples. Put on bed.

3. Open bathroom door so it swings back for privacy from kitchen and rest of RV and gives you an extra 2 feet of room.

4. Adjust water.

5. Get wet.

6. Turn off water

7. Soap up

8. Turn on water and rinse off

9. Dry shower stall with dirty t shirt.

10. Get dressed in tiny space

11. Put stuff back.

But the shower does work. We do get clean. And at this camp ground there is a water hook up so we have as much water as we want!

Is it worth it? Well, the highs are high – like right now. It is 6:30 am. Simon is asleep. Evan and Josh just left to ride bikes in the dark to the Fishing Bridge Visitor Center to meet up with a group for a 5 hour class on Wildlife Photography. Simon – assuming he feels better – and I will have breakfast, do a little school work, work on his Junior Ranger Badge and take a bike ride through unparalleled beauty.

So while this is not a vacation, it is an adventure. Get over yourself Wendy – it is so not about the shower.

Tomorrow onwards to Devil’s Tower.

Sunday, 20 September 2009

On Being Seven Years Old

When I was seven years old I ran away from home. I was so tired of always having to fight the competition for attention. And the competition was fierce - three brothers, a big dog, a couple of cats all vying for the attention of, for all intents and purposes, a single mom. But if I ran away people would notice I was gone and boy would they be sorry. I bet they would have to call the police and everything.

I took my suitcase and packed it with the essentials - cookies I stole from the kitchen, my favorite baby doll Annie, and a pair of underpants. I put on my coat and walked out the door. 4 PM on a January afternoon in Minneapolis. Cold, icy and dark. “Bad idea, Never mind. I will just go and hide in the cleaning closet and that way I will be able to hear everyone talking about me and how worried they are,” I thought to myself.

I snuck into the closet. Not a big place, but it had an overhead light you could turn on by pulling a string. This is where all the extra rolls of paper towels, cleaning supplies, vacuum and brooms were kept. I could push things to the side and make a little nest from my coat and sit down. For the next hour I played with my doll, ate the cookies and tidied up the cleaning closet.

An hour later my mom opened up the closest and was surprised to see me. She asked what I was doing in there and I told her through my tears that I was running away and nobody even noticed I was gone.

I recently told this story to my boys as we were tooling along the vast expanse of prairie in between Rocky Mountain National Park and our next stop for the night – the Walmart in Rocky Springs, Wyoming.

Josh has asked Evan and me to tell him five small moment stories from our lives. He will be choosing one to expand upon for a writing class he is doing on line through Johns Hopkins Center for Talented Youth.

After I told this story Simon said, “Oh Mommy I am so sorry for the little girl Wendy. That is exactly how I feel. Nobody talks to me. Nobody plays games with me. Everybody ignores me.”

My heart is breaking. “Oh Simon, that isn’t right,” I reply and immediately feel guilty for pulling him away from other kids his age and think this is the issue that is going to get him onto a therapist couch at the ripe old age of ten.

We decide the next day will be Simon’s Day and we will all turn ourselves into 7 year olds for the day and play. Just play.

Monopoly, card games, read books, draw pictures and play imaginary games. He calls me Wendy and we make fun of his teacher Penelope Snodgrass and call her old Stuffy Pants, and Antelope Snotgrass. Evan makes fun of his teacher old Higgenbottom and we call him Professor HiggenBumBum. We make plans for how we will torment them in our next day of class. But then Simon says Mrs. Snodgrass brought him chocolate crepes for snack one day at that was nice,

For lunch we have a picnic in the City Park in Pineland Wyoming, where the city motto is, “All the civilization you need.” We pretend we are airplanes and ninjas and run around the pond. We climb on the big rocks, hold hands going double down the slides, swing up to the trees, and climb to the moon on the climbing frame.

We take an adventure walk and cross a bridge - but the bridge is blown up behind us so the only way we can get back across the river is to walk through the water. Simon’s croc floats away and Josh comes to the rescue and races through the water getting all wet but retrieves the croc!

We eat lunch on a picnic table -- Simon picks out and eats mac and cheese. We eat purple popsicles and watch each others tongues turn purple.

Then I have to go through a portal to turn myself back into a stinky old adult because I need to drive. But before we go through the portal we make a plan to meet every day to be seven. Excuse me, seven and three quarters.

Tuesday, 15 September 2009

All wound up

We are tooling down Route 24 in Kansas, one of the big square states in the middle of America. Cawker City is in the rear view mirror, Colby is 120 miles in front of us. That is where the nearest Walmart is waiting for us to Boondock tonight. [Boon* Dock: to camp overnight for free; usually in the boon docks, a.k.a The Boonies, far away from civilization.]

Walmart is Boondocker friendly, in fact, they court us. They are hoping RV’ers will pull in and have a yearning for a new water filter, a box of Fruit Loops or a round of ammunition at 3 AM. Please note, we not staying in any old Walmart – we have standards you know. This is a Super Walmart!

We went to Cawker City, Kansas because it is the home to the world’s largest ball of twine. We planned our day around the visit.

We needed to go to Cawker City because we are going to visit the home of the world’s largest ball of string in Minnesota and we need to get the good info so we can compare and contrast.

Twine vs string.

Funny how your set of needs can change.

There was a time when I needed to go to Starbucks.
I needed to go the Parent’s Open House Night at the kid’s school.
I needed to go to meetings.
I needed to answer emails and phone calls.
I needed to go to the grocery store.
I needed to go to the dry cleaners, the bank, the shoe repair, the library, my office.

What did I need to do today?

Visit a ball of twine.

Miss my old needs? I'm a frayed knot.

Saturday, 12 September 2009

Birthday Projection

It is my Birthday. Very early on my birthday. The hall clock just struck 4 AM.

I am 47. All that really means is that I am 3 years from turning 50.

Josh has been fretting all week trying to figure out what to get me with no money. I keep telling him to write me a poem or a story. He could sing me a song. How about a day of Excrutiatingly Fabulous Behavior? All those ideas went over like dead balloons.

The past 6 years in London we would go to my favorite place for my birthday – Kew Gardens. And last year we took an overnight adventure and went to Dover after a wonderful birthday lunch with my girlfriends at a beautiful pub in Maida Vale.

This year we will get up early and sneek off to the Lincoln Memorial Gardens where my Grandmother’s ashes were scattered and my aunt has spent thousands of hours as a volunteer. It will be lovely.

My 20th birthday I was in Japan just starting my junior year of college and on my way to Chieng Mai University.

My 30th birthday I was on the equator in Kenya in the midst of a 6 month adventure around the world.

My 40th birthday I had little babies and was living in Georgia.

Projection:

My 50th birthday I will have been living in an RV for the previous 3 years. My uncut hair will be to my waist; Evan’s beard will be to his. Our 10 and 15 year old boys will be wearing clothes we fashioned from an assortment of indigenous materials we found here in Peru where the RV broke down and we have put it up on blocks. I will have changed my name to Meriwether and the whiskey will be long gone.

Major League Freak Out #3

Here I am again. 2:45 am. Awake. No, I don’t think it is menopause, nor a panic attack. I think I am just nervous about heading out. For the past 1.5 weeks we have been lounging around my aunt and uncles beautiful home. We are spread out over the dining room table, the kitchen table, the sun porch, the laundry room, the bathrooms, the bedrooms – heck, our bikes and helmets are all in the garage. We have moved in.

The boys have ridden around the park and know a variety of ways to get to the playground. We have been to family night at Baskin Robbins two times, the public library on 7th street once. All three guys got their haircut at the same barber shop my grandfather use to go to. 12 bucks a head. The CFO was not happy. I have been to Schnucks (the grocery store) so many times I know my way around and even have a Loyalty Card.

We were in Peoria at the Minor League Baseball game Wednesday night watching the Cedar Rapid (that is in Iowa, folks) Kernels play the Peoria Chiefs. Words I am amazed I heard out of my 12 year old mouth, “Dad, can we please, please, please go to Cedar Rapids to watch the next game?”

And tonight we were at a Bluegrass Festival in New Salem with my other Aunt and Uncle on a perfect late summer evening night. Bluegrass Gospel. Who knew there were so many songs about Calvery and The Old Cross? Jesus is everywhere here in the US of A.

And now we are leaving. Again.

I feel like a truck driver.

Evan has been making soups and freezing them in anticipation of the remote national parks we will be in and the lack of reasonably priced groceries. Tomorrow I have some pumpkin breads to make. I know this is ridiculous but after having read Stephen Ambrose’s Undaunted Courage and seeing the first half of Ken Burn’s Lewis and Clark it seems like we are preparing our 30’ flat bottom boat for our own trip. I gotta remember to load on the barrel of whiskey to make sure we can give all our men their daily ration of 1 dram a piece. Maybe that is what I need to get back to sleep.

Sunday we drop mom at the airport in St Louis and head to Topeka, then on to Boulder then to Wyoming.

That is it!

I am freaking out because we are going to Wyoming.

The name sounds like what it is. Far away. Wind swept. Whyyyy? Ohhhhhh! Miiiing! Lonesome. I know in my rational state that all will be well. We will be in the RV for the next 2 weeks solid and then be in Minneapolis again staying with friends.

That is another cause of my angst. It isn’t just the thought of Wyoming it is knowing we will be in the RV for two weeks straight. Will I have to actually use the toilet in the RV this time? So far I have been able to avoid it.

Relax Wendy. All will be well. Yoga breath.

Nope, that didn’t work.

Maybe a few more yoga breaths.

Fill the lungs. Slowly release the breath.

A quiet mind.

That is what I need.

How do you get a quiet mind at 3:08 in the morning?

Is it possible to freak out about your inability to quiet your mind?

Sometimes I fantasize about a partial lobotomy to remove my anxiety lobe. Maybe there is a kit I can get somewhere on line. A DIY Lobotomy Kit availble on Ebay.

Did Meriwether Lewis ever freak out? With a goofy first name like that, I am sure he did. The Lewis and Clark scholars say he was also bi-polar which would account for the number of lapses in his journal. But he was driven. And now I am thinking, “I am just having a Meriwether moment.”

I need to head back to bed and think about transferring all my anxieties to little puffy white clouds and have them float away.

Yoga Breaths. Shots of whiskey. A partial lobotomy. Puffy clouds.

Goodnight Meriwether.

Wednesday, 9 September 2009

RV Elementary - Opening Day

Dear Interested Parties at the Vermont Department of Education and Elsewhere,

We are glad to report that we held our Orientation Session on Sunday morning from 10 – 12 noon and all students were present.

Please find below details on what was covered.


Orientation


I. Welcome and introductions
- Reginald P. Higgenbottom, 6th Grade head Teacher
- Penelope Q. Snodgrass, 2nd grade Head Teacher
II. Goals of School
III. School Rules
IV. Schedule
V. Getting to know each other
VI. Refreshments
VII. Break Out Sessions

Goals
• Keep up with 2nd and 6th grade curriculum (maybe beyond) so next year students slip easily into 3rd and 7th grade.
• Encourage students to be creative and flexible.
• Encourage lively and friendly debate.
• Make learning fun by having fun,

School Motto
• CARPE DIEM

School Rules
• Respect each other and all teachers
• Be prepared
• Cannot ask teachers where supplies are
• Wear seatbelts when school is moving
• Only comfortable clothing allowed

Schedule


Date Time Place
Sunday 9/6 10 – 12 Springfield – Dining Room Table (DRT)
Monday 9/7 9 -11 Springfield - DRT
Tuesday 9/8 9-11 Springfield – DRT and Park for Bike Race
Wednesday 9/9 9-11 Springfield – DRT and Peoria
Thursday 9/10 9-11 Springfield – DRT and Library
Friday 9/11 MAMA JO DAY
Saturday 9/12 National Holiday
Sunday 9/13 Drive Day To Topeka, KS
Monday 9/14 9 – 12 RV Table - Drive to Boulder, CO
Tuesday 9/15 9 – 12 RV Table - Drive to Wyoming
Wednesday 9/16 9 – 12 RV Table

Respectfully submitted by,
Reginald P. Higgenbottom, 6th Grade head Teacher
Penelope Q. Snodgrass, 2nd grade Head Teacher

Springfield, IL

September 9, 2009
Springfield, IL

Mom is moved out of her condo, all her things are in storage, and we made it back to join Evan and the boys here in Springfield, Illinois. Whew.

Where am I?

I never lived in Springfield but I have been coming back here since I was a baby. My mom was born and raised here along with her 2 sisters and her brother. All Springfield High School graduates. My great grandfather and great grandmother lived down on 4th and Allen Street. Maybe you know them – Minnie and Ace? My grandmother, Evelyn Adele Mama and her husband,Poppa Al, lived over on Douglas Street for the last 10 years. Mama Dell died last spring at 97 years old. Now there was a woman who knew how to have a good time. She would put a hat on and walk around the block and call it a party.

My wonderful aunt and uncle live in a big house down from Washington Park and they have embraced the addition of our RV to their driveway. They were with us for a few days before they took off for a few weeks to Italy so we are house sitting along with my Mom.

Before they left we had a family reunion in the park next to the playground. KFC, pizza, Chex mix, delicious salads and too many desserts. Heaven. Josh and Simon were astounded by the amount of delicious food and the number of second cousins who were their age – even one with red hair.

I imagine most family reunions are like this - where people gather by generation. The elders gather in a circle of lawn chairs talking about their shared memories. The great aunts and uncles that use to share memories of the Great War and life in the 1930’s and 40’s have made way for my mom’s generation talking about the 1950’s and their Capezio flats. My generation is in the bull pen waiting to be called up. What will we talk about? 70’s pop music and bell bottoms?

We have toured the new Lincoln Museum www.presidentlincoln.org (fabulous), visited with my aunt and uncle who live out in the country, ridden our bicycles through never ending corn fields and past old farm houses, visited the Frank Lloyd Wright Dana Thomas House (www.dana-thomas.org) and dreamed about fountains for our new house - where ever that may be, found the Mel-O-Cream donut factory www.mel-o-cream.com, participated in Baskin Robbins Tuesday Family Night specials, started school for the boys (no small feat!) , Josh has made two batches of heath bar crunch cookies from scratch all by himself, and we have spent lazy afternoons with my mom playing Monopoly and hearing her stories of Springfield in the 1950’s.

Today we are off in my uncles Buick for a 1.5 hour drive north to Peoria to check out a planetarium and see the Peoria Chiefs play in the minor league baseball playoff game. Tomorrow New Salem, IL is on the agenda to tour the re-enactment of life on the prairie during Lincoln’s era and for the Bluegrass festival.

Hmmm. Maybe Springfield would be a good place to settle once we are finished with the Big Adventure.
.

Friday, 4 September 2009

Small Women and Big Rigs

I love driving the Big Pig. It makes me feel powerful. I am 5’3” - the rig is 30 feet long. When I drive I can kind of hear Evan talking to me from the shotgun seat but certainly not the kid’s conversation at the table behind me. But I can hear the Ipod playing my favorite John Denver, Carole King and James Taylor tunes, and I can hear myself singing along…sounding fabulous I might add. And I can hear and feel the roar of the mighty Ford engine.

I like to pretend I am a truck driver and give a knowing wave to my fellow drivers as I pass. I think I need a hat to be taken more seriously. My 2” pony tail in the back of my head does a number on the serious factor.

I like driving 14,000 pounds of metal because I get immediate respect from all the little tin cans around me. Respect may not be the right word. Fear. They know I can do a lot more damage to them then they could ever possibly do to me. Fear because they think I don’t know what I am doing and I may go out of control and side swipe them. Fear because they don’t know for sure if I can see them cowering in the right turn lane. Those little sissies. Hee hee hee.

All of my senses are awake when I am behind the wheel. They have to be. Whenever a truck passes the sway blows the rig and I need to compensate so we don’t go over on the shoulder.

Is this love of power and heavy machinery a short person thing? If I was use to having people look up at me would I derive as much enjoyment as I do now?

Is this just another issue about respect? Isn’t life all about respect?

This morning I was talking with my incredible 23 year old niece – who also happens to be about my height. She picked me up at 6:40 AM in order to make the 7 AM Sunrise Yoga class she teaches in La Jolla. After our 75 minute session (where I got lots of personal attention to help align my arms into the proper warrior, downward dog and cobra positions) we got our Yoga approved ice coffees and walked along the ocean and talked about lots of things. Including short people and respect.

She is dating a short guy. I married a short guy. I have given birth to a couple of short guys…although the committee is still out given their ages and we are hoping to channel the Uncle Rick gene(*). We decided it is definitely harder to be a short guy than a short woman. Society. It all comes back to society. People have preconceived ideas about short people. And it is harder to be taken seriously. So that leads to a couple of options: A Napoleonic complex and the need to over compensate; and/or play the silly one and make it work for you; ignore the whole thing because it is more about who you are and the more comfortable you are in yourself the less it matters.

My best friend from college, Becky, is up there - 5’ 9” at least. I thought we were the same height. Then one night coming back from a bar in Northfield, MN making the 2 mile walk back up the hill we passed a store front that acted as a mirror. After years of friendship I finally saw it. I didn’t even come up to her shoulder. How could she have respect for someone who didn’t even come up to her shoulder? For me that would be a 9 year old kid.

I am short and I am proud. That’s why I yell so very loud. Alright.

(*) Uncle Rick is my 6’2” brother.

San Diego, September 1st, 6 AM

I am sitting on the bathroom floor in the hotel room at the Hyatt Hotel. I am sharing a room with my big brother and I don’t want to wake him. He is 51. I am 46. Will I always call him my Big Brother?

It is moving day for Mom. Bekins Moving Company arrives between 8 and 9. We are ready for them. It is a whole different thing helping someone else move as opposed to moving yourself. Not that I have too much trouble filling up the boxes to cart off to Goodwill (or Charity Shops as we say in the UK)….but when it is someone else’s stuff, get out the pitch fork!

The things we found.

She has saved the words to songs I wrote in Thailand for a Farewell Dinner with our Chieng Mai University hosts in 1983.

She saved the medical records from my younger brother’s car crash in Yuma, Arizona in 1985 when he was driving my older brothers work truck, fell asleep behind the wheel and woke up covered in floor wax when he drove off the road.

I found the title to an insurance policy from the first house she bought by herself after she and my dad divorced in 1973.

Poems and cards written to her by children, grandchildren, friends. They were mini time capsules that transport us to another time and dimension.

I am so glad she is sitting next to me and my brother while we do this. To laugh together. To remember together. To keep the choice pieces and throw the rest in the recycle bins together.

Yesterday Mom had a open house from 1 – 3 pm so her friends could come and pick over what she was getting rid of and have a bit of her with them after she moves. I love the comments they made to me on the sly, out of earshot of my mom. “I don’t know what we are going to do without Jo Anne. She is so positive.”; “She is the one who holds us together.”; “She is so much fun and funny.” ; “She is the rock.” ; “She is the one who connects us and keeps us on track and looking forward to new things.”

That is my mom.

I am so proud of my mom. She is so accomplished. So fun and funny. So wise. She is a healer. She is a giver. So intuitive. So able to grasp any situation and find the best pieces. She is calling the retirement community in Scottsdale where she is moving her “camp”. She has lived in San Diego for 34 years but isn’t sad to be leaving. She is looking forward to making new friends and exploring a new place.

What she is sad about is that she isn’t able to help me and my brothers anymore. Maybe not physically because her arthritis is so nasty her hands have turned into claws. But she gives me so many things everyday. Mostly, her outlook.

While she is homeless for the next few months before her new place in Scottsdale is available, I am homeless, by choice, in the RV. We are both being flexible and have put ourselves into new situations and are looking forward to the adventure.

I hope I can channel my mom on my bad days to remind myself of life’s bigger adventure and that every day is a choice on how you approach it. Yes, it sounds sappy, but it works.